Stupid Cat!

Today started off crappy and it’s ending up pretty crappy, too! Something better happen to turn this shit around or I’m gonna beat someone, dammit!

I woke up this morning after hitting the snooze a little too much. I take a shower and get out to trim my beard. Now, the back story on my beard is that I usually keep facial hair of some sort because without it, I swear I look 14 years old. No man my age (29 now) wants to look like a 14 year old! So, I’ve been sporting a beard so far since it’s cold out and whatnot. I got out to trim my beard so I don’t look quite so homeless. I trimmed the right side of my face and my beard trimmer suddenly quit working. I thought maybe that it didn’t charge right or something. I plugged it back into the charger and tried to use it plugged in, but it just didn’t have the juice to do anything. I tried again and that’s when I noticed that the wire was broken, and by broken I mean the stupid cat chewed through it! Now, normally I would just be pissed and I would’ve just said “whatever” but I had some complications. My face was already half-trimmed. Half of my beard was trimmed and the other half was homeless looking. So, what else could I do but use my regular razor and shave it all off?! So, now I look like a 14 year old boy! DAMMIT!

I am the opener at work, which means I open the doors and get everything moving in the office. I’m the first one to arrive. When I get there at 7:00am, the phone is ringing. Now, this could be a doctor looking to speak to the staff or something, but it’s not. It’s some chick on the phone asking if her grandfather has an appointment this morning. This chick is calling on the back line where only other doctors and employees are supposed to call on. I tell her that no one is in the office this early and to call back after 9 when the office line is open. When I told her this, she gave me an attitude. She asked, “No one can tell me if he has an appointment?” What did I just say? NO ONE IS IN THE OFFICE! I found out that this chick’s mom used to work at the office or something. She thinks she has the right to use our backline and get special crap? Screw that! I don’t know her or whoever her family is that used to work here. They don’t work here now, so screw them!

I go to make the morning coffee so it can be fresh and ready for those that come in and I notice that there are 6 packages of coffee down there. Now, one of my duties at the office is to order the coffee and keep it where it needs to be kept. I used to keep the whole box of packages under the coffee pot, but they started to disappear, so we started keeping only 5 of them there with the spares in the drug closet with all of the drug samples. Seeing 6 packages of coffee means someone else is messing with my coffee! Dammit!

Now, I continue with my Monday and as usual Monday sucks. It’s too damn busy at this doctor’s office on Monday because all of the people that got sick over the weekend. It’s so busy that I don’t really get a chance to send a text message to that special girl that I’m nuts over. I did get to post a blog though in between patients! I thought she’d be proud of me for that. ;)

Then at lunch time, she texts me “Hey”. I respond saying “Hi” and then she says that maybe we should stop talking. This was way out of left field and sent me straight into shock. I didn’t know what was going on. Now, things were going on with her that made me think maybe she got back together with someone, which could always be a possibility. I mean, we are only seeing each other “casually” sort of. So, I figured that with the circumstances that have occurred, she had gotten back with the other dude. I would’ve been very bummed about this, but I could deal with that. I mean, it’s got a high chance of happening. That being said, he said that she had some strange feeling that something was up with me! We’re talking about me here! I don’t know if any of you actually know me… probably don’t… but I’m a man that says what’s on his mind. I’m someone that will tell you how it is even if it sucks. So, she says she has a feeling in her gut that something is up with me. I don’t even know how to take that. Nothing is up with me. Everything is the same with me (as boring as that sounds). If anything is up, it’s that I like her more. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it now. I love this woman. Something happened to her recently that sent her to the hospital. She’s now resting at home. I feel bad because I want to be there for her. I want to comfort her and be by her side but because of our circumstances, I can’t. So, if she wants to quit seeing me because I love her, then so be it. I won’t understand it, but I’ll deal with it. I don’t want to lose her. I love what I have with her and would give anything in the world to be with her. I don’t know what she’s feeling or thinking. I know she’s reading this… or will eventually. Nothing’s up with me, babe. I’m still me and I still adore the hell out of you. Your gut feeling is wrong, baby. I miss you and want nothing more than to be with you.

Now because of her having a feeling, I'm getting sick to my stomach. I want to leave work and go home. My stomach is bouncing off the walls and I feel like I want to vomit. She's going to take a nap now and I don't know what's happening. I hate not knowing things I should know... :(

I grab a quick meal
while skimming through the paper.
Death, death, death, comics.

Dodging eye contact
from my neighbor’s awkward stare,
I leave my nice house.

As I start my car,
my neighbor just keeps staring
and doesn’t wave back.