How To Beat Up Anybody!

Judah Friedlander’s new book kicks butt.

You probably know Judah Friedlander best for his performance as Frank Rossitano on 30 Rock, or as the late Harvey Pekar’s pal Toby Radloff in the movie version of American Splendor. But talk is cheap, and so is paper, thus was born Judah’s new book How to Beat Up Anybody.

As Judah reveals himself to be the nerd-Chuck Norris, you can learn to layeth the smack down on three-armed men, dinosaurs, ninjas, Bigfoot, and, uh...muggers. All techniques are handily illustrated in convenient pictorial style.

Hedge clippers, hula hoops and high heels are among the wacky weapons favored by the self-described World Champion, who also claims to be able to make the planet shake and travel in time with his spaceship in order to combat cavemen. Yet there are also culinary tips: did you know that pulling a bagel apart is good practice for castrating a foe? Also impressive is a photo series in which Friedlander teaches karate to nude strippers on his day off. Truly, his charity in teaching others self-defense knows no bounds. Even so, this last one stretches credibility just a bit. After looking at the photos many times, in close detail, we wondered: would strippers really be naked on their day off?

Either way, the only thing that kicks more @ss than Friedlander - so we hear (from him).